Yeah sex is cool, but have you ever made it from your flat to your desk in under half an hour; had a really cracking eggs benedict; or bagged tickets to the latest must-see West End show?
These are just some of the things that make Londoners happier than having sex, according to the 2018 City Life Index from Time Out. They surveyed more than 3,000 people in the capital, and 31 other cities around the world, about modern city life and found that having a shorter-than-average commute (between 15 and 30 minutes) boosts our happiness more than a spot of action in the bedroom.
Despite having an aloof and impatient reputation, Londoners were found to be a fairly happy bunch on average, with 84.6% of those surveyed claiming to have felt happy in the previous 24 hours.
Surprisingly – or perhaps not, depending on how long you spend on a sweaty Tube every day – the figure rose by 2.2% for those who'd had sex recently but the increase was even greater among those with a commute shorter than the average of 39 minutes.
Eating brunch, going clubbing, seeing live music and going to the theatre also apparently make Londoners happier than sex, and we're not quite sure what to make of it. Some other things that keep their spirits high include being in a new relationship, making a new friend, earning more than £40k, volunteering, exercising and going to the pub.
But Londoners were also found to be the most stressed in Europe, with half of those surveyed claiming to have felt harried over the previous day. Unsurprisingly, housing plays a big part in this – renters were far more stressed than homeowners, backing up previous research on the link between housing problems and mental health.
Being a millennial was also associated with higher stress levels, along with using Facebook or Instagram more than 10 times a day, compulsive email checking, eating lunch at your desk, getting less than seven hours sleep, earning less than £20k and smoking.
The wider survey concluded that Chicago is the world's best city this year, thanks to its "outstanding food and bar scene" and above-average scores for happiness, culture, affordability, city pride and people's feelings towards their neighbourhood. But do its residents care as strongly about their transport system as Londoners do about theirs? No chance.
There are plenty of reasons to look forward to tonight's full moon (the second one of the month) and the coinciding lunar eclipse. But, once the dust settles and February officially starts on Thursday, we'll be left in the dark — literally. We won't see another full moon until March 1, so February won't feature the energising effects that accompany this bright, expansive lunar phase. But that doesn't mean we're staring down a month of total celestial boredom.
Depending on whom you ask, next month will have a "black moon," which isn't nearly as scary as it sounds. In this case, it simply refers to a month that lacks a full moon, but it can also describe a month with two new moons or the third new moon in a season that has four total (which is one more than the average three). Regardless of the definition you happen to be dealing with, its spiritual significance remains essentially the same. During a black moon, the energetic focus is on the new moon, the one phase in which the moon is completely invisible. This lunar phase is most closely associated with personal growth, self-improvement, and fresh starts.
Keep in mind that we'll be coming off a lunar eclipse when we begin this black moon period. Eclipses, lunar and solar alike, are believed to signal the end of something and the start of something new. So, as you begin what's set to be a pretty introspective month, you might be better served to focus on any new beginnings you could kick off in your inner life, rather than anything that's going on at work, in your family, or anywhere outside yourself.
Maybe you want a clean slate in your workout routine, so you sign up for a new class or upgrade your old pair of sneakers. Or, you might want to make a small change to be more productive every day, in which case you could shift your sleep schedule by an hour or drink more water throughout the day.
The new moon encourages us to reflect on what others can't see. Use the time leading up to the the new moon on February 15 to decide what new changes you'd like to see in yourself. Then, after the 15th, as the moon begins to wax toward fullness, you can put those plans into action. Think of this as a new moon ritual that you have weeks to accomplish — don't be afraid to be ambitious.
Besides, it's actually relatively common for February, the shortest month in the year, to lack a full moon: February black moons occur about every 20 years. So, you can look forward to (or, depending on how you feel about quiet reflection, dread) yet another monthlong tour of your innermost self in 2038, give or take.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
Being a working mum is hard, and it can often feel like missed deadlines, forgotten dry cleaning, and never, ever seeing friends is the norm. But we don't have to reinvent the wheel to figure out a better way through. Just look around at all the super successful mums kicking ass on a daily basis.
This Is How I Do It is a new day-in-the-life series featuring some of these impressive women, who juggle big careers and families with grace and humour. Their stories won't literally do your laundry and pack your kids' lunches while you answer email, but they offer an honest peek at how someone else gets her life together every day.
Photo by Catherine Hall, courtesy of THE NOVOGRATZ.
Cortney Novogratz, 46, and her husband Robert, have been the design duo The Novogratz since they started their careers in Manhattan 25 years ago. They're parents to seven: Wolfgang, 20. Bellamy, 19, Tallulah, 19, Breaker, 17, Five, 12, Holleder, 12, and Major, 8. You may remember Cortney from their Bravo show, 9 by Design, or their HGTV show, Home by Novogratz. You definitely don't want to miss their Instagram account.
My day-to-day:
6:00 a.m. I wake up, walk downstairs, and start the coffeemaker first thing. I drink some water while I wait and glance at my phone: emails, texts, Instagram, social media, etc. Robert usually is up already, believe it or not, and in our home office. I usually try to bring him a cup of coffee and have a quick chat with him.
6:30 a.m. Our son Holleder wakes up on his own and pulls homework or his sports uniforms together, showers etc.
6:50 a.m. I wake the rest of our kids.
7:00 a.m. Luckily, now I only have to make two lunches; there was a time I made seven. While I'm making lunches, I also make breakfast. Usually, it's a few different types of cereal but some days we do bagels and/or eggs when I have more time.
7:25 a.m. Half the kids leave for school. Since moving to L.A., we must drive our kids to school, and I can't be at all those schools at once, so my older kids either Uber or my friend Stefan (takes a village) will drive them. There's always a rush of finding backpacks, last minute homework being printed, etc.
7:45 a.m. Robert takes Major to school. Robert walks while Major skateboards, which a bonus since the other kids' schools are so far away. I get another cup of coffee and race through the house to clean up before our office team arrives..
8:30 a.m Our home becomes our office — our team arrives and of course I make more coffee, and sometimes some tea.
9:00 a.m. We have a powwow of the day or week and what is all happening. If I don't have a full morning I try to fit in a walk in the Hollywood Hills around our home.
10:30 a.m. I'm dressed for success and on-site for a project or running errands, sourcing tiles, fabrics, etc. Or, I'm in our home office on conference calls or Skype sessions.
1:00 p.m We usually host meetings around lunch, whether it's local clients or clients in from the East Coast. Robert and I believe our home is our best showroom.
3:00 p.m. I pick up our youngest, Major, while Stefan or Uber grabs the rest. If there's a game, Robert and I try to attend.
4:00 p.m. The tutors, piano teacher, skateboard coach, etc. arrive at our home. I realised a long time ago I was more productive bringing folks to us rather than running all over the city for extra activities. Some days are left open for play dates, and of course, I try to host so I don't have to circle around town picking up my kids before dinner. Plus, I'd rather all then kids hang at our house. If you work for us, the afternoons can be full of life, but I always check back in and answer any interviews or emails that are needed.
6:00-6:45pm: We either go out to eat or start cooking. We take turns setting the table — some of my kids are quite good while others aren't — but each night someone has the duty. There's always someone extra at our table — a coach, friend, contractor, etc. Since moving to L.A., we eat outside every night and the kids run around, which is awesome.
8:00 p.m. Homework begins and goodness sometimes it's just a simple spelling test, but sometimes it's a full on project with wood-cutting in the yard.
9:30 p.m. I try to get everyone showered and bathed. Having five boys that doesn't always work. I try to get our youngest to bed first, but again that doesn't always work. There's a lot of wrestling going on and nine times out of ten something gets broken. So I clean up, pull out the vacuum, and so forth. As long as no serious injuries, it's all good. I prefer no emergency room runs after 7 p.m.
11:00 p.m. I try to watch TV or a little news while I check back in on emails. Then it's bedtime.
Photo by Catherine Hall, courtesy of THE NOVOGRATZ.
My current passion project: Learning to maintain the citrus trees in my yard. Since moving to California I've taken up gardening more, and it's so fun to be able to use the lemons and oranges that grow on our trees.
The best part of my day: Coffee time before everyone wakes up. I get to breathe, plan the day, and have a few minutes of alone time since I usually don't get it again the rest of the day.
The one thing I wish I didn't have to do: Laundry. If I must, then I choose only towels; thank goodness I have my friend and housekeeper Diana to help — we do at least two loads a day since we're a clan of nine.
The one thing I always worry about: I'm usually not someone who worries. I guess you can't with seven kids. But lately it's been difficult transitioning my oldest three into adulthood — off to college, into first apartments, and so forth. I seem to worry about them because I no longer have control, but missing them is even harder.
The secret to being a successful working mother is: My secret is that I work alongside my husband, their father. We don't take our success or failures too seriously. Working together allows us to juggle it together. We've had a home office for over 25 years so that family life and work life is all under one roof. It means we never shut either one off, but I prefer it that way. I wouldn't want to sacrifice either; I love our career so much that it doesn't feel like work, and naturally I love my big family. I like to call it our creative chaos.
The one thing I would tell other working mums: Let go of the guilt. Having a career allows your kids to know you not only as their mum but as a person with a passion and interests outside of them. Our kids will leave us one day, and we need to have other things going on. Yes, at times we drop the ball, make mistakes, or miss a few events due to work, but we are their parents forever. We can't forget that we were someone before them. Robert and I chose to have kids to enrich our lives and raise good humans. Instead of changing who we are, we've tried to include our kids in what we do, while allowing them to find what they love. Support other working mums — we need each other. Reach out to each other with your questions. Working mums get it done, so be proud.
Becoming a mother changed this thing about me: I was the youngest of five and a bit spoiled, however I knew from an early age I wanted a lot of kids and a full house. Having my son Wolfgang instantly created a less selfish me. I became less all about Cortney and started to understand that what we put into life, we get out of it. Give and you shall receive.
Tell us about your village. Who helps raise your kids: "It takes a village" is my motto. I even once photographed our village of 20 folks for our family holiday card with the caption "Honour Your Village This Season." My contractor/Manny/friend Stefan has been in our lives for over 15 years. He met his wife through us, got married at our home, and even moved across the country to stay part of our village. I'm thrilled to share he will soon become a father. My designer Michelle, second in charge, literally does it all. She works closely with Robert and helps run our company which helps run our life. She's a lawyer, designer, and also sings with our son's band. Her sister Heidi stepped in to hold all of us up including Michelle. We love families so we believe in hiring them. Most of our interviews start with, Do you like kids? Do you have a sense of humour? Oh, and can you design? Diana is our housekeeper, house manager, and lucky her son Ericson is good friends with Major, so when she needs to work long hours — if we're hosting a big party or something — she can do so while being with her kids. Major and Ericson are known to be the last ones on the dance floor at our parties. I try to communicate with our village and with each year ask what they want to see change, because in any field you've got to feel inspired, and it can't ever get dull. Fortunately, if you work with the Novogratz clan, it's never really dull.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
For the better part of January, the nation was captivated by the sentencing hearing for Larry Nassar, the former doctor for USA Gymnastics and Michigan State University who was found guilty of multiple counts of sexual abuse and sentenced to 40 to 175 years in prison. At the hearing, 156 current and former gymnasts read deeply personal, graphic impact statements about the sexual abuse they suffered at the hands of the disgraced doctor.
On the surface, this is a story of one terrible man who found a devious way to take advantage of vulnerable girls. But what Nassar laid bare was that the rot extends beyond one predator or even one sport — it's the product of a broken system, one that unwittingly grooms young girls to stay silent and bow to the will of their superiors.
“This is bigger than Larry Nassar,” said two-time gold medalist Aly Raisman, one of Nassar’s many victims, in an interview on the Today Show last week. “We have to get to the bottom of how this disaster happened. If we don’t figure out how it did, we can’t be confident that it won’t happen again.”
As sinister as it is to consider, in retrospect, “[Nassar] picked the perfect system to be a predator in,” says Robert Andrews, MA, LMFT, a sports performance coach who has worked with Olympic gymnasts. Refinery29 spoke to sports psychologists and former gymnasts about the self-policed system that enabled an abuser and failed the athletes that trusted it. When you consider the perfectionist culture and insular politics of the sport, it’s horrifyingly obvious how a sexual abuse scandal of this scale happened right underneath our noses.
[Nassar] picked the perfect system to be a predator in.
An elite gymnast’s journey begins when she is a small child, as young as six or seven, even. This means a gymnast has to decide to forego her childhood and devote her life to a sport in grade school. (Let that sink in.) If they do choose to go this route, they usually have to kiss their parents goodbye, move away from home and in with host families, and dive headfirst into full-time training, which can mean six hours a day, six days a week, working towards one singular goal: competing in the Olympics and taking home a gold medal.
This requires laser focus — a sort of discipline that most adults can’t even muster. In order to excel throughout the rigorous training, these girls are expected to act mature and composed, and present to the world a face of a squeaky clean, yet incredibly tough, athlete, which can be particularly emotionally taxing for children, says Kristen Dieffenbach, PhD, executive board member for the Association for Applied Sport Psychology. "You're taught to act and move like an adult, but you're still a child and you still think like one," she says.
Ashley Relf, MA, a sport performance coach and former USAG National Team member from 1993 to 1994 (who was never treated by Nassar) said training at this level was like going to war. "I remember crying a lot when it was time to go to practice," Relf says. At practice, she and fellow gymnasts had to show up and seem physically indestructible and stoic, so they could replicate that during competition, Relf says. And if gymnasts made a misstep, coaches would yell, spit, and occasionally throw things at them, Relf says. "When you're young, you don't think about it more than, That's just how they're coaching you, you're in trouble, you're not doing things correctly," she says.
In this world, at this level, coaches are king. When gymnasts reach a certain stage in their sports career, these impressionable athletes and their hopeful parents put their total trust in the coaches, trainers, and doctors like Nassar, who are supposed to support them and teach them to become stars. “You think everything they’re doing is right,” Relf says about coaches and support staff. “As long as your parents are paying them, you trust in them.”
To spectators, gymnasts seem grown-up and unbelievably poised, but behind the scenes, gymnasts function at the beck and call of their coaches and trainers, says Robert Andrews, MA, LMFT, a sports performance coach who has worked with Olympic gymnasts. "The sad thing about it is that it starts so young, and those kids have no concept about setting interpersonal boundaries, using their voice, and setting limits,” Andrews says. “They're terrified [during training]: They lock up and freeze, and they're supposed to go on to do advanced skills.”
What this amounts to is a disturbingly perfect place for a predator. For example, at intense training camps, gymnasts are expected to follow strict diets. Nassar took advantage of this by sneaking the girls contraband junk food and coffee. He traveled with them to competitions and the Olympics, and was the first point of contact on the hotel contact sheet the girls were given. He brought them small gifts, like pins, and left handwritten notes for them on medical supplies. He assigned the girls nicknames, like “Kiddo” and “Goofball.” Juxtaposed with their harsh coaches, Nassar was a friend and confidant who bent the rules on the gymnasts’ behalf. This tactic — befriending victims in order to build false trust — is textbook for abusers.
As a doctor, Nassar had access to extra liberties, thanks to the trust our culture puts in people who provide medical care. He often performed his treatments far from a doctor’s office: in tucked-away corners of a gym, in basements, in athletes’ hotel rooms, or his own apartment, where he could more easily abuse patients. Sometimes, he would provide quick treatments for free. McKayla Maroney, Olympic gold medalist, wrote in her impact statement that Nassar once gave her a sleeping pill before a flight, and then she woke up in his hotel room as Nassar was sexually abusing her and calling it a “treatment.” “I thought I was going to die that night,” she wrote.
With sports as a whole, Dr. Dieffenbach says that there’s a lack of concrete boundaries between trainers and athletes, which opens up an abuse and power dynamic. “You have to teach people to understand that, if I’m the coach, I still have power over you and can’t be your friend — not in the traditional sense,” she says.
You think everything they’re doing is right. As long as your parents are paying them, you trust in them.
Gymnastics is an entertaining sport, one that gets mainstream audiences excited about female athletes, in particular. But with more excitement comes more pressure: When USAG competes at a global level, they’re up against countries that use notoriously draconian coaching methods. It’s easy to think that, in order to compete on a global scale, these young athletes have to be pushed to the limit. As a culture, we have to ask: At what cost?
Karolyi Ranch, owned by gymnastics legends Bela and Martha Karolyi, is famous for making USA Gymnastics what it is today — and it’s also where a lot of survivors cited Nassar’s abuse. The Ranch sprawls 2,000 acres of land in Walker County, Texas. Though physically massive, the training complex is isolated and remote. In an impact statement, Mattie Larson, former member of the US National Team, said, “There’s an eerie feeling as soon as you step foot on the Karolyi Ranch.”
The politics of the sport are insular, too. Gymnastics, even more so than most Olympic or otherwise elite sports, is an extremely small world, and it all revolves around a few top trainers and gyms, like the Karolyi’s. What this means is that gymnasts essentially have to train with the Karolyi's to be elite; whereas in other sports you may have choices of coaches and training camps all around the country.
Martha Karolyi, the coach who ran most of the camps at Karolyi Ranch, was renowned for her discipline and keen ability to hand-pick the next stars for the national team. "I have all this information on my mind not only about their scores or their performance, but about how strong of a person it is,” she said in an interview with WTHR in 2015. “How dedicated of a person it is? How disciplined a person it is? How much she is ready to do everything in order to be successful?” Naturally, this power can seep into other aspects of life: “Coaches have tremendous power of: I give you my attention. I equate that with your worth,” Dr. Dieffenbach says. “It becomes a place where it's dangerous to rock a boat or say something.”
“They always made us feel like if we ever said anything or complained we were being dramatic or high-maintenance or difficult,” Raisman told The Washington Post in January. “When you only have five girls who make the Olympic team — we were just conditioned from a young age not to say anything.”
We've all failed those girls.
Put together, all of these conditions create the perfect smokescreen for a predator. "[USAG] let it go because they win a medal, and the medals are more important than the athletes," Andrews says. "It looks like the system is working, but now that we look behind the curtain, it's dreadfully messed up." As spectators, we see Olympic gymnasts winning medals and we fawn over their accomplishments. We give them nicknames (the "Fab Five "), make them into memes ("McKayla Maroney is not impressed "), and cheer them on whenever an Olympics rolls around. But what the Nassar scandal shows is that we’ve neglected to ask the tough questions about what it takes to win a medal — to extremely devastating results.
As Dr. Dieffenbach puts it, "We've all failed those girls.”
So, what do we do next? First, we do just as Raisman says. We hold everyone in USAG accountable, and rethink the structure and culture that allowed this to happen to hundreds of young gymnasts. Already, steps have been taken: Last year, a diverse group of independent experts (including former Olympians) came together to found SafeSport, which now provides a place for Olympic and Paralympic athletes to confidentially report allegations of sexual assault or misconduct, outside of the intense hierarchy of USAG. Anyone legally employed (from volunteers to medical personnel) by the 49 national governing bodies for each of the Olympic sports is required to follow SafeSport’s code of conduct, which forbids sexual misconduct, one-on-one meetings with minors, and gift-giving — all of which were involved in Nassar’s crimes.
Despite everything, there are still scores of young girls who dream of being the next Aly Raisman or Simone Biles — and they shouldn’t be turned off from chasing achievement. But going forward, things must change: No one should have to sacrifice their safety in order to reach the podium. The fraught system that’s been in place for too long must be transformed. If Nassar’s sentencing hearing taught us anything, it’s that those who’ve had the uniquely gruelling experience of training on the inside are the ones who know what work needs to be done.
We’ve spent the past few decades watching these gymnasts. Are we finally ready to listen to them?
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
No matter what you might say about Hillary Clinton 's decision not to fire one of her top advisors after a young woman on her campaign accused him of inappropriate touching, kissing, and suggestive emails — and you just might have a lot to say — her nuanced reflection on it deserves our attention.
While Donald Trump fear-mongered and hyperbolised his way through an extra-long State of the Union on Tuesday, in which he said essentially nothing about women, much less sexual harassment, Clinton posted a 1,500-word essay on Facebook examining her decision not to fire Burns Strider, a senior advisor to her 2008 presidential campaign accused of repeatedly sexually harassing a staffer who shared an office with him.
"The short answer is this: If I had it to do again, I wouldn’t," Clinton writes.
Sources told The New York Times that despite her campaign manager's suggestion, Clinton did not let Strider go but instead docked him for several weeks' pay and required him to undergo counselling. She also separated him and the woman, assigning her to another office, and, according to her post, "put in place technical barriers to his emailing her." He was warned that he'd be fired if he did it again.
Several years after working for Clinton, Strider was fired from another job for inappropriate behaviour. About this, Clinton writes: "That reoccurrence troubles me greatly, and it alone makes clear that the lesson I hoped he had learned while working for me went unheeded. Would he have done better — been better — if I had fired him? Would he have gotten that next job?"
The short answer is this: If I had it to do again, I wouldn’t.
She admits that at the time, she thought firing Strider wasn't the right solution. "Taking away someone’s livelihood is perhaps the most serious thing an employer can do. When faced with a situation like this, if I think it’s possible to avoid termination while still doing right by everyone involved, I am inclined in that direction. I do not put this forward as a virtue or a vice — just as a fact about how I view these matters," she writes.
Clinton didn't make the decision that many of us, after the cathartic outpouring of the #MeToo movement, view as the right one. She should have fired him, 2018 lens or not. But her statements show a remorse and contrition that are unfortunately rarely heard from public figures. Unlike many, she dissects her decisions and learns from them. "There is no way I can go back 10 years and know the answers. But you can bet I’m asking myself these questions right now," she writes.
Where are the former Harvey Weinstein executives writing thoughtful essays about what they should and shouldn't have done while working with the abusive entertainment mogul? Where are the statements from tech company CEOs that go beyond PR lingo? (Et tu, Republican Party?) How many public figures actually publicly examine themselves in less than flattering ways?
Precious few. But Hillary Clinton does, and our outsized expectations of this woman are hard to overlook. The striking amount of times she apologised in What Happened — her own, personal memoir — shows that she's more prepared to examine her failings that the average millionaire. And it brings up questions of why women are constantly being asked to mop up men's failings.
There are issues with her statement. At one point, she says that a female boss has "extra responsibility to look out for the women who work for her," which suggests that women should assume more of the burden around these workplace abuses. This bears out in real life: Just look at all the women at the Golden Globes (or, really, insert your awards show/event here) who spoke up in support of Time's Up and all the men who didn't and silently wore pins. But as we're all learning and growing in this moment together, there's value to making mistakes out in the open rather than hiding behind an iron-gated PR team.
Some will ask why it took her so long to speak up about this, and her response is honest: "I’ve been grappling with this and thinking about how best to share my thoughts. I hope that my doing so will push others to keep having this conversation — to ask and try to answer the hard questions, not just in the abstract but in the real-life contexts of our roles as men, women, bosses, employees, advocates, and public officials."
Finally, and most importantly, Clinton writes, she's spoken with the young woman who was affected, and the woman has "read every word of this and has given me permission to share it."
It's not going to please everyone in America, because, well, insert shrug emoji here. But it absolutely matters that Clinton delivered a well-reasoned, nuanced response. It matters because we live in a world in which this very article, and pretty much every article about Hillary Clinton, will be pummelled with misogynist attacks, links to alt-right propaganda, "BENGHAZI" GIFs, and misspelled swear words. It matters because the discourse has become so poisoned that there seems to be no room for learning, being human, and making mistakes. Especially not for women like Hillary Clinton. There are only litmus tests.
One of the most criticised women on earth made a mistake when she believed she was doing the best by her staffer. She responded to it more thoughtfully than the vast majority would have. "In other words, everyone’s now on their second chance, both the offenders and the decision-makers. Let’s do our best to make the most of it," she writes.
It would do us well to listen to the words of the supporters commenting on her Facebook post, who say things like: "Why do women tear each other down? She has been a role model and representative for women her whole life and yes she’s not perfect! Are you?"
Another said: "Why do you even need to defend this when we have a sexual offender in the White House and not a single Republican seems to care?"
They have a point. We demand so much of Hillary Clinton — and women in general. It's about time we held men to the same standard.
We've reached out to Clinton's spokesperson and will update this story when we hear back.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
If you're anything like me, you spend a good amount of time psyching yourself up for a first date. Or, you know, having your friends do it for you. I've lost count of the number of "Do I have to go on this date?" texts I've sent to my best friend. It's not so much that I change my mind and suddenly don't want to hang out with whoever I've set the date with. It's just that I'm super awkward and prone to nerves that make me want to stay in my bed forever.
And I'm not the only one. I've gotten the same type of texts from friends before their first dates. There's just something about meeting up with a stranger (if you're online dating) that makes the butterflies in your stomach go into hyper-drive. What do you say? What do you wear? What if you spill your drink all over your shirt? (Hey, it happens.)
Ahead, we've talked with two New York City-based dating coaches, Lindsay Chrisler and Donna Barnes, for the tips you'll need to nail that first date and calm the butterflies. The big takeaway? You're going to be fine.
Own your nerves.
"If you get nervous, say you're nervous. If you feel shy, say you feel shy," Chrisler says. It's important to be honest about how you're feeling, instead of trying to pretend that you're cool as a cucumber. Being upfront about your nerves might actually make it easier to connect to your date, Chrisler says. That kind of vulnerability opens you up for "a whole new dating experience."
Remember that you're normal.
Nerves before a big date are to be expected. Hey, your date is probably also battling nerves, Chrisler says: "Everyone wants to be liked, everyone wants to have a good time, everyone is scared that neither of these things will happen. If you're nervous, you're very, very normal."
Don't be afraid to make fun of yourself.
Worried about tripping over your words or spilling soup all down your blouse? That's totally understandable. But chances are good that your date won't take your clumsiness as a sign to run away as fast as possible. So chill out and, if it happens, just make a light-hearted joke about it, Barnes says. It will be much more endearing if you call out your clumsiness than if you shut down from embarrassment.
Remember: It's not all about you.
People, women especially, can have a tendency to walk into a first date like they're going on a job interview. But it's important to remember that this meetup isn't just about you impressing your date, but also about your date impressing you, Barnes says. So stop worrying so much about what you say, or whether your laugh is too loud, or if you chose the right outfit — and start paying attention to what you do or don't like about the other person.
"Assume that they will like you," Barnes says. It will give you confidence, which is much more attractive than worrying about everything you say.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
WWD is reporting that the British version of the Oscars made the decision to put out the call to action to wear black “less than three weeks ago,” with the note to the industry reading: "With BAFTA being the first major film awards ceremony in Europe this year, we feel it is important to make a statement to show global solidarity and that the issue is not being forgotten, and to join hands with people across all industries who have experienced inequality and abuse."
It continued: "This is why we are inviting you to wear black to the awards ceremony, to follow suit from our sisters who attended the Golden Globes. Wearing black is a strong, unifying and simple statement – a physical and visual representation of our solidarity with people across all industries who have experienced sexual harassment and abuse or have been held back due to an imbalance in power. It is also the easiest colour for the majority to wear and feel comfortable in."
Similar to the panic that ensued once it was announced that celebrities would be wearing all-black to the Golden Globes, “designers and brands are scrambling to replace their original choices.” A BAFTA spokesperson declined to comment on the matter to WWD, though, as an added pressure, the awards show is taking place during London Fashion Week. Sounds like stylists will, once again, take to Instagram to show off their racks of black dresses. Still, it’s worth acknowledging that, like what we saw on the red carpet at the Golden Globes, when you're limited to wearing just one colour, creativity forces your hand.
Guest at this year's BAFTAs are expected to include Annette Bening, Frances McDormand, Margot Robbie, Sally Hawkins, Saoirse Ronan, Kristin Scott Thomas, Allison Janney, Lesley Manville, and Octavia Spencer, and we can’t wait to see how they make a statement, political and otherwise.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
Cold weather brings with it statement knits, oversized puffer jackets, and – on a slightly less glamorous note – dry, dehydrated hands. Despite being the most exposed part of our body during the colder months, they're often the most neglected; it can be tricky to find a product that sinks in fast while still packing plenty of moisture. There's nothing worse than a lovely scented hand cream that leaves greasy fingerprints all over your keyboard.
So we've found the heavy-duty skin protectors that not only boost moisture levels, combat eczema and even reduce signs of ageing, but are also fast-absorbing and, most importantly, non-greasy. Read on for our edit of the balms, creams, salves and lotions that will keep your palms, nails and cuticles hydrated all year round.
Formulated with a blend of probiotics, prebiotics and lactic acid, this fast-absorbing cream protects the skin's microbiome, while the combination of shea butter and daisy extract softens.
Gallinée La Culture Hand Cream, £9.50, available at Look Fantastic
A mix of mandarin oil, rosemary leaf and cedarwood soothes rough skin, cuticles and nails in this handy tube from Aesop. Rich but non-greasy, it helps to fight dermatitis, combat the first signs of ageing and leaves skin feeling hydrated and smooth.
Aesop Resurrection Aromatique Hand Balm, £19, available at Space NK
Enriched with 20% shea butter, L'Occitane's hand cream has achieved cult status. Blended with almond, honey and coconut oil, and essence of jasmine and ylang-ylang, it protects and heals dry, dehydrated skin.
L'Occitane Shea Butter Hand Cream, £20, available at L'Occitane
Fortified with antioxidant rose oil and nourishing shea butter, Lano's hand cream leaves a silky, protective veil for continued hydration.
Lano Rose Hand Cream Intense, £9.18, available at Look Fantastic
A long-standing favourite, this emollient-rich treatment comforts and conditions dry, chapped and irritated skin with sesame oil and Japanese mulberry.
Clarins Hand and Nail Treatment Cream, £21, available at John Lewis
This cream intensively moisturises and protects the skin's barrier from environmental aggressors such as cold weather, water and soaps. Enriched with urea and lactate, it reduces dryness, redness, scaling and irritation.
Eucerin Dry Skin Intensive Hand Cream 5% Urea with Lactate, £8.42, available at Feel Unique
A deliciously scented pick-me-up. Formulated with geranium, walnut and apricot kernel oil, and with a lightweight texture, Jo Malone delivers soothed and softened hands.
Jo Malone Geranium & Walnut Hand Cream, £22, available at Jo Malone
A hand treatment that packs a punch. Working to protect dry and chapped hands from daily aggressors, it leaves a non-greasy film that restores the skin's moisture barrier. Perfect for sensitive skin sufferers.
La Roche-Posay Lipikar Xerand for Hands, £5.50, available at Feel Unique
Restore suppleness and soothe irritation with this fast-absorbing lotion formulated with Atlantic kelp extract and magnesium PCA.
REN Atlantic Kelp and Magnesium Energising Hand Lotion, £18, available at REN
A non-greasy, botanical blend of echinacea, vitamin E and antioxidant-rich beta-carotene, Liz Earle's cream provides instant relief to dry hands, helping to condition nails, soften cuticles and protect against dehydration.
Liz Earle Orange Flower Hand Repair, £22.50, available at John Lewis
Delivering 12-hour hydration, this rich cream strengthens the skin's moisture barrier, leaving hands softer and smoother.
Clinique Deep Comfort Hand and Cuticle Cream, £19, available at Feel Unique
For velvety soft skin, look no further than Laura Mercier's amber vanilla hand cream. Combining notes of tangerine, coconut, amber and brown sugar with intensely moisturising grape seed and vanilla extract, it's soothing, comforting and most of all, smells divine.
Laura Mercier Ambre Vanille Hand Cream, £13, available at Space NK
Combining omega 7, camellia, virgin plum and macadamia to form a silky barrier that locks in moisture, this luxurious option is super smooth and fast-absorbing.
Elemis Pro-Radiance Hand and Nail Cream, £27, available at Elemis
Pop a tube of this in your handbag for on-the-go hydration. The gel-cream formula, infused with community trade argan oil from Morocco, leaves hands soft and smooth.
The Body Shop Wild Argan Oil Hand Cream, £5, available at The Body Shop
Enriched with jojoba and avocado oils, soothing colloidal oats and restorative copper active, this water-resistant, anti-inflammatory cream will soothe hands and cuticles. But what we love most about it, is it's prolonging effect on nail polish. Lack of suppleness can cause your perfectly painted nails to chip, and this product prevents just that.
Slizir Hand And Polish Cream, £21.95, available at Slixir
Specifically designed for dry, busy hands, this thick but non-greasy blend of botanical oils conditions and moisturises skin, forming a protective barrier against further moisture loss.
Kiehl's Ultimate Strength Hand Salve, £14, available at Feel Unique
Whether you're a minimalist who loves clean lines and simple shapes, or a maximalist who believes more is more, the jewellery you choose makes as big an impact as the shoes you wear or the bag you carry.
From Annie Costello Brown 's Matisse-esque chandelier earrings, which swept Instagram this summer, to Edge of Ember 's classic yet contemporary designs, we're always on the lookout for new brands to add to our jewellery box.
Click through to find the pieces adorning us and the brands we're fawning over right now.
Chinese born, London based artist, Ejing Zhang, combines thread, wood and resin, creating beautifully unique jewellery pieces. She uses hand poured resin tiles with abstract detailing across cocktail rings, pendants and statement earrings.
We're loving the enamel pendants that can be mix and matched together. It's a playful option if you want to experiment with textures and sizes.
Ejing Zhang Pool Enamel Necklace, £100, available at Ejing Zhang
Ming Yu Wang was founded in 2013 by Jennifer Wang, who takes a modern approach to designing statement jewellery. With a focus on 'wearable art', her influences are an amalgamation of contemporary architecture and minimalist artists using ethically sourced materials.
This Vector ring is our stand out piece thanks to its structured simplicity and bold white agate gemstone sat atop an 18 karat gold base.
Ming Yu Wang Vector Ring, £534.91, available at Ming Yu Wang
Amanda Thomas started her jewellery line in 2005, aged just 16, as a creative outlet for her obsession with accessories. Her signature layered chains and body chains have expanded into a collection of feminine but contemporary pieces.
You can't go wrong with a classic hoop. Experiment with contrasting sizes for a modern twist.
Luv Aj Baby Amalfi Tube Hoops, £32.13, available at Luv AJ
Founded in Denmark in 2007, Pernille Corydon encapsulates Scandinavian simplicity in her designs. Finding inspiration in fashion, architecture, furniture, nature and in people, each piece is simplistic with a distinct touch of femininity.
We love these earrings from the Ten Years of Creation collection. Designed to represent the peacefulness you feel when you're totally zen, they're your new minimal accessory staple.
Pernille Corydon Escape Earrings, £56.09, available at Pernille Corydon
Otiumberg is the brainchild of sisters Christie and Rosanna Wollenberg. After a lengthy, but unsuccessful search for elegant everyday jewellery, they created Otiumberg. Each piece is carefully chosen and timeless in style, with each collection tied to your lifestyle, rather than passing trends.
Another big plus is their commitment to social responsibility; all their stones are conflict free and they buy their pure gold and silver bullion from Morris and Watson, whose precious metals are produced by recycled waste from jewellers within local mines in Australasia. We love the dainty vibe of their stacked gemstones.
Otiumberg Ceylon Sapphire Huggie Hoop, £150, available at Otiumberg
Soru Jewellery is another sibling collaboration, having launched in 2013 by British-Sicilian sisters, Francesca and Marianna. Inspired by the decadent approach to accessorising by Sicilian women, they've created a collection that's as bold as it is ornate. Natural semi-precious stones and crystals can be seen throughout their pieces, made for the maximalists among us.
Soru Jewellery Earring Selection, from £70, available at Soru Jewellery
Nocturne's uniqueness lies in it's mix of materials and traditional jewellery making techniques. It was founded in 2003 by Claudine Bertinotti Lenoble, with the aim of celebrating Asian artisan crafts with a modern aesthetic.
With a studio based in East London, Nocturne embraces colours and textures, offering eclectic, effortless pieces that are versatile and contemporary. These hand-made, gold plated 18K rhinestone earrings are playful, ornate and effortlessly cool.
Nocturne Pauline Stud Earrings, £125, available at Nocturne
London-based contemporary jeweller Loveness Lee hand-makes distinctly statement pieces, using the skilled process of cuttlebone casting and patinatio. Rich in texture and jagged shapes, each piece adds flair and drama.
These oversized hoops are given a modern makeover - we'll be wearing them with hair tied back so they can take centre stage.
Loveness Lee Maze Hoop Earring, £370, available at Loveness Lee
Alex Monroe's jewellery is synonymous with a very British sense of style. The ultra-detailed and textured pieces are individually designed and handmade by Alex and his team in England. Growing up in the Suffolk countryside, nostalgia for his idyllic childhood shapes his craftsmanship and continues to provide inspiration - from his signature bumblebee (which celebrates its 10th anniversary this year) and the Entomology collection to the Wildlife and Botanical offerings.
Perfect for intricate, delicate jewellery lovers, we'll be wearing this baby bee necklace over crisp white shirts and floral dresses.
Alex Monroe Baby Bee Necklace, £132, available at Alex Monroe
Edge of Ember is the luxury jewellery brand with a socially responsible production process. Founded by Lynette Ong, and inspired following her travels round Asia, the brand collaborates on its designs with skilled artisans from India, Nepa, Indonesia and Thailand, using sustainable raw materials where possible in safe and healthy working conditions.
Style meets substance with these simplistic, structural pieces, so there's no need to compromise your conscience.
Nina Kastens founded her eponymous label in 2014, having completed a goldsmith training course in New York. A contemporary aesthetic runs throughout her timeless-with-a-twist jewellery, which is handmade in Germany.
The brand's AW17 collection, The Face, is inspired by sculptural and interior objects, and is made from 18k gold-plated sterling silver and mother-of-pearl. These surrealist pieces will add character to your work wardrobe.
Nina Kastens Mop Face Earrings, £305, available at Nina Kastens
Milk Tooth LDN is dedicated to statement earrings and has two standout offerings. The Pluralist Collection is the brand's first original range, made up of geometric shapes, art deco colour schemes, and bold patterns. The Vintage Collection is a treasure trove of sourced and curated vintage earrings, from '80s chandeliers to '60s colour-pop discs.
While there's plenty of vintage to choose from, we're taken by Milk Tooth's own line, with earrings that go as nicely with oversized shirts and denim as they do with cocktail dresses.
Zoe Morton's jewellery is inspired by her adventures in the East Sussex and Devonshire countryside. It really needs to be held to be understood – the textural quality of the metal brings the pieces to life. Having studied at the Alchimia Contemporary Jewellery School in Florence, Morton's tactile designs centre on travel, experiences and adventures.
In our shopping bag? The woven and twisted earrings, plus the road trip pendant.
Zoe Morton The Plantlife Earrings, £205, available at Zoe Morton
Katie Mullally worked in her grandmother's antique business on South Molton Street, London, when she left school, sparking a love for hallmarks and metalwork. All her pieces are tested for silver purity and hallmarked by the Goldsmiths Company Assay Office, meaning that as you pass your jewellery down, your inheritors can trace the date and designer.
Heritage is a big theme in Mullally's pieces, with coin pendants paying homage to her Irish roots. We're layering ours up with her other charms, include a peace sign, pineapple, and wishbone.
Deborah Blyth, created her eponymous brand to make pieces that are inspired by the world around her. Each piece is interchangeable and can be layered, mixed and matched. All handmade and bespoke, they offer an engraving service with every piece for a sweet personal touch.
We love this Verity Pendent, which we'll be layering over a crisp white shirt and roll neck.
Deborah Blyth Verity Pendant, £70, available at Deborah Blyth
London-based Rosh Mahtani was taken by Dante's Divine Comedy while studying at Oxford University. Working in e-commerce and styling by day, by night she began creating her collection, inspired by the 100 poems in the literary masterpiece. Like Dante's work, each of Mahtani's pieces is "battered, imperfect, and a little bit melancholy".
From the imprinted, misshapen False Promises ring, to the Persisting Memories charm necklace laden with absurd faces, her jewellery is a surreal, off-kilter addition to your nightstand.
Alighieri Jewellery The Surreal Betrayal Earrings, £350, available at Alighieri
For the first time, Topshop and Topman have come together for a new season campaign. Released today, the SS18 dual-branded shoot is centred on fresh-in denim, and despite the hugely popular high street brands being siblings, it marks their joint debut.
To celebrate the collaboration, which was shot by rising star, photographer Oliver Hadlee Pearch, a short film accompanies the campaign, art directed by Jonny Lu. In true Topshop and Topman style, the imagery and video are full of movement, fun, and personality. The short film features various models discussing the notion of first impressions.
The newness doesn't stop there, though. Along with the joint spring campaign, the brand announced the launch of three new Topshop denim fits to sit alongside your trusty Jamies, Baxters, and Leighs.
Courtesy of Topshop.Courtesy of Topshop.
The New Boyfriend, a mid-rise loose-fitting straight-legged pair, sit at the ankle and are the perfect compromise between polished and relaxed styles. We're teaming these with a crisp white shirt and some black loafers.
Next up is the Wide Leg jeans, which feature a super flattering high waist, come in non-stretch denim, and fit wide throughout the leg. We're going full-on '70s with this pair by tucking in a printed pussy bow blouse.
Courtesy of Topshop.
The last pair in the brand new line-up is the Cropped Straight, a stretch-denim pair with a mid rise and, you guessed it, straight leg. Go West with these and wear with cowboy boots and a loose-fitting classic white T-shirt.
And that's not all the exciting news. For anyone whose ever found themselves frustrated in the changing rooms when trying on denim, Topshop has launched half sizes both online and in-store. W25, W27, W29 and W31 will be available in the classic fits Jamies, Joni, Mom, Straight, Jamie Flare, and the Crop in both black and blue washes. Inbetweeners rejoice!
Topshop continues to provide us with the ideal high street denim – now, which pair to choose?
If you're anything like us, you keep a close eye on Rihanna's beauty looks, not just for creative inspiration, but in order to get a first glimpse at future Fenty Beauty launches. Now, one of the global-superstar-turned-beauty-boss' two Grammys looks could be a clue into the next drop from her powerhouse brand.
As Allurehighlighted, Rihanna worked two looks throughout the evening. The first was burgundy-hued glamour, created by Fenty makeup artist Priscilla Ono, who used Match Stix in Mocha and Espresso on the musician's eyes, and Mattemoiselle in Shawty and Glossbomb on her lips.
The second was a dramatic transformation, suited to the heat she brought in her Adam Selman sparkly fuchsia fringed dress (what else?), while performing 'Wild Thoughts' with DJ Khaled and Bryson Tiller. Whether she was paying homage to Pantone's colour of the year, Ultraviole t, or not, her eyelids were awash with a rich purple shadow. Her lips, too, were transformed with an iridescent copper gloss.
While Ono gave the product list for look one on her Instagram account, she gave away no details of the products used to create the bold colours in look two, which Riri wore to the Grammys afterparty at New York's 1-Oak nightclub. And this is where the guessing games begin.
Rihanna has been known to showcase Fenty products several months before they officially launch. Back in December, she wore One of the Boyz, the lilac Mattemoiselle shade, four days before the lipsticks launched.
With no eyeshadows in the brand's main line – only in the sparkle-laden Galaxy collection palette, which dropped before Christmas – could this Grammys beauty look be the first tease of Fenty eye colour? If true, naturally the shades will be wild and the pigment will be deep. We can only wait in anticipation that Rihanna keeps expanding her brand offering.
In terms of street style, no one does it quite like the Danes. But what is it exactly that has us so transfixed with those perfectly put-together outfits at Copenhagen Fashion Week? Is it the abundance of playful colour? Or the masterful layering? Or the way those girls manage to look elegant, on-trend yet laidback all at the same?
Queen of the Danish fashion set Pernille Teisbaek told Refinery29: "It must be the combination of something very effortless, classic and casual that makes Scandinavian style so easy to integrate into the wardrobe and long-lasting. Pieces that will last a long time in your wardrobe because they don’t go out of style. That’s also important when having a sustainable mindset."
Whatever it is, we want it. Click on to see our favourite looks outside the shows at Copenhagen Fashion Week AW18 for inspiration for your spring wardrobe.
Stylist Emili Sindlev wears a checked skirt suit, dressed down with blue socks, a T-shirt and a Chanel bag.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
Viktoria Rader tucks a striped shirt into high-waisted trousers, finished off with a trench coat, Acne scarf and snakeskin boots.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
Vanessa Hong shows us how to incorporate more colour into an everyday look, wearing a bright orange Anne Vest jacket over a black Vans hoodie with boyfriend jeans and Boyy bag.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
Pernille Teisbaek braves the rain in a fluffy white coat, jeans and white ankle boots outside the Cecilie Bahnsen show.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
The chicest Abbey Road recreation we've ever seen.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
Costume magazine fashion editor Jeanette Madsen tucks a green turtleneck into grey wide leg trousers while fashion director Thora Valdimars wears a Miu Miu zip up under a Burberry red trench with a Wandler green belt bag.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
Funda Christophersen wears an Anne Vest brown coat over an H&M dress with M.i.h jeans and Chanel sling-back heels.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
Juliane Diesner makes her Staud bag the focal point of her elegant monochrome outfit.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
Elle's style director Mie Juel teams a Birgitte Herskind checked jacket with red Baum und Pferdgarten trouserrs and red Louboutin shoes.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
Darja Barannik wears a Shrimps Hokus coat with cropped white trousers and a bright green Boyy bag.
Photo by Christian Vierig/Getty Images
Caroline Daur shields herself from the rain in a patent black hooded coat, amped up with a dragon adorned Gucci bag and tinted aviators.
Innovations in women's health products are few and far between – it took about 200 years for the vaginal speculum to be brought up to date, and it's a similar story when it comes to sanitary products.
Tampons have modernised to some extent in recent years – there are now eco-friendly options available, for instance – but many women still experience one problem: leakage, which forces them to double up with a pad.
Now, one company has developed a nifty solution – the Tampliner, an applicator tampon with a mini-liner attached, which tucks between the labia to provide extra security during that time of the month.
Feminine care company Callaly, which created the tampon, claims the device to be the first innovation in tampons in 80 years. This is quite something when you consider that more than a quarter of women are unsatisfied with the tampons they currently use and of the remaining women, most of them still wear a liner just in case, according to surveys conducted by the company.
Photo courtesy of Callaly.Photo courtesy of Callaly.Photo courtesy of Callaly.Photo courtesy of Callaly.
The tampon is inserted by by pushing it through the hole in the mini liner and into the vagina. Once it's in the body, your finger goes into the virtual applicator, which the company claims is more hygienic than other brands, and when it's in the right position the mini liner should fold out into place.
The company was co-founded by gynaecologist Dr Alex Hooi, who claims to have heard "repeated stories about the inadequacy of period products" during more than 30 years in the job. "Many women who wore tampons didn’t trust them and wore liners at the same time, so I decided to invent something better."
It's also more than 95% biodegradable, with the organic cotton tampon and mini-liner both 100% biodegradable. The remaining 5% of the product is plastic and so can't be recycled, however. The membrane is made from polymer film, a type of plastic used widely in medical devices, owing to its strength, biocompatibility and hemocompatibility. This means it doesn’t negatively impact the body and is compatible with period blood, the company says.
Even if the Tampliner isn't quite right for certain women, Hooi hopes that people will be pleased to see a new product available on the sanitary product market, which he believes is in "desperate need" of innovation. We couldn't agree more.
We might have laughed when JT announced his new album Man Of The Woods and dropped a pic of himself looking like Marcus Mumford stumbled onto Brokeback Mountain but we all still want to hear it, right? There is also new music from MGMT, plus Kendrick Lamar will be touring the UK.
And the last of the Oscar contenders are being shown so if you're reluctant to get back on the booze horse, then consider a quiet evening in front of I, Tonya or Phantom Thread.
Click through to see the best new albums, films, shows and books in February.
Jess Commons, Health & Living Editor
Requiem, BBC One, starts 2nd February This new six-part BBC drama is being hailed as one of the scariest the BBC has ever made. And it’s a murder mystery. So that sounds right up my street. It’s about a woman who, after her mother commits suicide, ends up in Wales looking into the disappearance of a little girl.
I, Tonya, in cinemas 23rd February Margot Robbie? Marvellous. Allison Janney? Queen. This is the true story of Tonya Harding, the world-class figure skater stripped of medals and banned for life for her involvement in attack on rival Nancy Kerrigan. '90s figure skating fashion looks like it was nothing short of spectacular by the way.
Gillian Orr, Content Director
Lady Bird, in cinemas 23rd February It's receiving so many award nominations you hardly need my advice to go see this gem of a movie. Every single person is perfectly cast and rarely are we gifted such a flawed and honest character in a female coming of age film. It's a must-see.
MGMT, Little Dark Age, released 9th February Does anyone really care about MGMT anymore? That they're performing this month not at Brixton Academy but down the road in the much smaller Brixton Electric suggests that not many do. But the eponymous first single from their new album Little Dark Age is a banger so I'm intrigued to hear what the former psych kings are doing these days.
Katy Thompsett, Sub Editor
Everything Is Recorded, Everything Is Recorded, released 16th February There can’t be many people with the clout to make an album featuring Sampha, Ibeyi, Giggs, Infinite, Damon Albarn and Kamasi Washington but XL Recordings’ boss Richard Russell has pulled it off for his project, Everything Is Recorded. Check out Mercury Prize winner Sampha doing his thing on lead track “Close But Not Quite ” – you won’t be disappointed.
Everything Sucks! Season 1 on Netflix, 16th February Man, we knew how to get our kicks in the ‘90s. It pains me – literally pains me – that kids today may never experience the utter joy of turning a calculator upside down and spelling out ‘BOOBS’. Better still, ‘BOOBLESS’. Fortunately, they can tune into this new Netflix original series and find out how we occupied ourselves pre-Snapchat (or whatever the kids are up to in 2018).
Sarah Raphael, Editor At Large
Zadie Smith, Feel Free, published 8th February Zadie Smith’s essay “Joy” is one of my absolute favourite pieces of writing. I think I prefer her essays to her books (or maybe just prefer essays to books in general because: time) so I’ve been looking forward to this for ages. Feel Free comprises 33 essays written between 2008 and 2017 and covers her passions, from Jay Z to Joni Mitchell. Very good thing to be spotted on the Tube reading.
Rose Matefeo Sassy Best Friend at Soho Theatre, from 19th-24th Feb I saw New Zealand comedian Rose Matefeo perform her show Sassy Best Friend at Edinburgh Festival last year and it was so good that I’m taking all my friends to see it this Feb at the Soho Theatre. In it, Rose talks about periods, things guys say in bed and the utterly unfair, gender-based affliction of the contraceptive pill. It’s all comedy gold. If you’ve ever been a young woman, you’ll laugh your pants off.
Natalie Gil, News Writer
Phantom Thread, in cinemas 2nd February I’m trying to catch most of the Oscar contenders before the big night and Phantom Thread is next on my list. I’ve purposely avoided all reviews and details of the plot before seeing it, but I do know it features pretty clothes, some salty and highly quotable one-liners and strong female characters. What more could you want?
Dust at the Soho Theatre, London, from 20th February Milly Thomas is being touted as “the next Phoebe Waller-Bridge”, so of course I’m going to sit up and take notice. Her one-woman show, Dust, received rave reviews at last year’s Edinburgh Fringe and sounds like a thoroughly intriguing concept. Thomas, drawing on her own experience of depression, tells the story of one woman’s depression, suicide and everything that follows. She visits her grieving parents, watches her boyfriend sleep with another woman and cries at her own funeral. Heavy stuff.
Anna Jay, Art Director
Stevie Martin: Work In Progress, 4th February, The Vaults, London Stevie Martin from mega-lols comedy sketch group Massive Dad is going solo for a work in progress show as part of The Vaults festival. Get tickets quick, as this is bound to be a sellout. Tickets £9.50. The Vaults, Leake St, London SE1 7NN
Survival Of The Fittest on ITV, February Anyone who watched Love Island would be lying if they’re not planning to give Survival Of The Fittest (from the same producers) a go, on ITV this February. Tragic, maybe. Addictive, surely. Let the guilty pleasures commence.
David Farrell, Performance Marketing Executive
Justin Timberlake, Man of the Woods, released 2nd February Totally bizarre. That was my first reaction to the title of Justin Timberlake's fifth (!) solo studio album. And, to be honest, I'm still not entirely convinced he hasn't lost his shit. The concept of MOTW is to modernise Americana by incorporating 808s, which seems like a ambitious goal even for the artist formerly known as Trousersnake. But, then again, where would we be if musicians didn't dare to take a risk? Cautiously optimistic about this one.
Loveless, in cinemas 9th February Russian director Andrey Zvyagintsev follows up 2014's highly acclaimed Leviathan with some more catnip for the critics. Loveless certainly doesn't promise to be a barrel of laughs but if a bleak exploration of the ills of contemporary Russian society is right up your alley, it won't disappoint in the slightest.
Natasha Slee, Social Media Manager
Jorge Pardo, Victoria Miro Hoxton, from 2nd February I’m not embarrassed to admit that the Victoria Miro in Hoxton is my go-to for guaranteed Instagram fodder. (Does that make me a bad art fan?) And judging by the queues for the likes of Yayoi Kusama in 2016 and Do Ho Suh in 2017, the sentiment is shared. The gallery is a short walk from the R29 UK office, so this month I’ll be spending a lunchtime ‘gramming Jorge Pardo’s colourful chandelier installations, inspired by Mexico. #InstaGood.
Facebook’s Gallery of Groups, 8-11th February Chances are you belong to a Group on Facebook. The throwback one (RIP the Will Wyatt Halls Speakeasy), the one for staying up to date on hometown politics (X/Y/Z town ‘bargains’ group), some for work, some for friends, some for hobbies. This month, Facebook have selected six stand-out Groups from a mindblowing 29 million for their ‘community’ exhibition ‘Gallery of Groups’. It’s free and on the South Bank – so one for popping into if you’re wandering the river over the weekend. Also FYI Potter fans, there will be a Quidditch Group on show.
Louise Whitbread, Editorial Intern
Madam Secretary Season 4 on Sky Living, 1st February The harmless but entertaining political drama returns this month, centring around Elizabeth McCord, the US Secretary of State, and her family’s continuous crises. It has your standard romantic storyline interwoven throughout terrorist threats, cyber attacks and government shutdowns. Plus, it’s always nice to see a female lead fighting for social justice, even if it is in an imaginary White House.
Glenn Brown: Come to Dust at The Gagosian Gallery, London, until 17th March If you’re looking to further rid the January blues, perhaps pay a visit to Glenn Brown’s latest exhibit Come To Dust, now showing at the Gagosian gallery (for free). Showing slightly terrifying mashups of Rembrandt portraits and creepy clowns with reworked bronze statues, it’ll make for a trippy and intriguing afternoon.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
Hit the snooze button, because we’re headed to dreamland. After January’s series of reality checks, we deserve the dose of inspired vision that’s coming our way.
The sun stays in future-oriented Aquarius until the 18th, triggering revolutionary insights into where your peers and society are headed. On the 3rd, freedom-fighting Jupiter runs into Venus, planet of values, asking you to enlarge your heart and invest more in your fellow humans. Like a good-humoured sleepwalker, you may be lured into over-performing your best intentions and promising more than you can give. Mental Aquarius will help you direct your good will toward learning more about how to make our communities more fair, honest, and equitable.
Much of February is coloured by a spacey standoff, peaking on the 17th, between a hyperactive Sagittarian Mars and stoner Neptune. Don’t be fooled by the Neptune’s bleary gaze: The planet will have no trouble convincing Mars to toke up and tune into a month-long Netflix binge. Normally, Mars powers us through our daily life, with a healthy dose of self-centred focus and plenty of vim. With Mars on couch lock, it may feel like the fire’s gone out. The downside of this transit is that self-oriented motivations — like wins, promotions, and quickie hookups — will be less rewarding and a few minutes of exercise may feel like a heavy slog. Neptune says to put your selfishness on the back burner and turn your compassion into action.
Pisces season officially starts on the 18th, but by then the sign’s intuitive, foggy style will be as familiar as the comfy dent in your sofa. Struggling against the energy is pointless — and why do that to yourself? This can be a restful and restorative period if you take it as it comes. Feed your imagination with hopeful visions, be kind to your sleepy body, and offer to help out for free. Anonymous gifts and volunteerism are supported by this combo, as are art-making, art-appreciation, and traveling for its own sake. To reach a goal, eavesdrop on your dreams. By the 25th, Mars is rubbing the sleep-dust out of its eyes and will want to do something with the beautiful visions it saw. Mars says to end your month with a bold act of caring: Risk everything for beauty, shoot for love, fight for art, and arm-wrestle for justice.
Aquarius January 20 to February 18
We’re all whistling your theme song, Aquarius. It’s a way cooler tune than "Happy Birthday," full of unexpected instruments, weird stops and starts, and multi-voiced choruses. It takes a special style to appreciate Aquarian music. Some people will never get it — but hey, that’s their loss.
For the first couple weeks of February, the pace of your day-to-day could be hectic and unpredictable with busy Mercury in your sign. I promise it won’t be boring, though. Regular encounters have more than usual significance, and even the tone deaf will be whistling your tune. Get out into the world, even if just to the end of your block, because everyone will be a potential friend-of-the-moment with important information to share. Your informal style is especially appreciated right now, as people are temporarily tired of social hierarchies. Groups are down for a change, so this is a great time to cross any boundaries that have been bugging you without having to worry about offending group members.
On the 15th, a solar eclipse in your sign electrifies relationship baggage and any old wishes that are holding you back. Opportunities are available for the taking, especially for those Aquariuses with mid-February birthdays. You may not be able to reverse your decision, but chances are you’ll be happier where you’re headed.
Don’t take it personally if your social life dries up mid-month. Most people are feeling zonked and maybe suffering from Neptune-driven late-winter blues. It’s prime chillaxing time for you, but be aware of an inclination to future-trip, even if you’re excited about what you foresee. No matter how far you run in your brain, you’ll have to come back to your body and any feelings you left there. The last week of the month will be exciting but still wonky. Have fun, gently. You’re not 100% clear yet.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Pisces February 19 to March 20
How big is your world, Pisces? Is it large enough to hold your dreams?
Sparkly ideas shoot around like Cupid's arrows at the beginning of the month. Your belief in the people you love is beautiful. Those relationships will feel full of possibility for a short time. It’s right to go toward who draws you and who opens your heart, or gaze upon a far-off babe. Those heart sparkles will wear off eventually and beautiful, broken people often fail to live up to expectations. Love them, but protect yourself, too. In astrology, relationships and possessions are tied up together, so those arrows may bypass a person and strike a beautiful pair of shoes instead. The same rules apply, though, and when it comes to your bank account, debt collectors are a bigger risk than heartbreak.
On the 10th, lovely Venus arrives in your sign (her favourite place, by the way), marking the unofficial beginning of Pisces season. Relationships lose their hard edges, giving a restorative refuge from the outer world. Romance comes easily — with a lost kitten, a friend, a teacher, a day-old sandwich — and without discrimination. Even a sneeze can sound like it means "I love you." Again, this may or may not be a long-term love, but there’s no law against enjoying it while it lasts.
By the 18th, it'll feel like every planet and their mother is in Pisces. The pace of events will slow quite a bit, and you’ll likely find yourself hesitating to make decisions, set goals, speak, and get your work done. That’s wise, so long as you’re taking care of necessary business. Bills coming due and deadlines may seem flexible, but that’s probably wishful thinking. Your intuition can give you useful guidance (one of the bonuses of being a Pisces) but regular fact-checking with reality will only make it more reliable.
Celebrate the beginning of your birthday season by sharing your Piscean ways with others. Paint, play music, visit water, write group poems, volunteer, worship what wants (and deserves) your devotion. The more you give this month, the happier you’ll feel.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Aries March 21 to April 19
Prepare for the adventure of a nap time, Ram. It’s a bushwhack into the underbrush in bunny slippers. It’s the Avengers with bowls of superheroic chicken soup. Your ruling planet, Mars, is the star of February, but it's subtitled and has long shots of blank walls. What I mean is, it’s going to be incredibly easy to go overboard this month and end up exhausted and sick.
Mars in fiery, inspired Sagittarius wants to climb the biggest mountain but forgot to pack any supplies. If this already sounds like you, keep in mind that, right now, Mars is ascending into a deep fog. Pure desire just won’t get you there this month. For your plans to succeed, you need to draw on unconventional energy sources and that might require slowing down. Consider your motivations. Who else benefits if you reach your goal? Will you be bringing to life a collective dream or yearning? The more you come from a place of caring and connection, the easier it will be to stay inspired.
The beginning and end of the month have the most space for headway. Do what you can during these weeks, but pay attention to your energy levels. As mid-February nears, schedule extra downtime and zone-outs. Chilling out can be almost as interesting as action, if you use the time to get creative and play. Antsy-ness peaks around the 23rd, when the sugar-high Gemini moon tries to get Mars to start a dumb argument. It might feel like your wheels are spinning in place, but your subconscious is busy dreaming up the next stage for your fabulous plots. Once you pick up speed again, you will be able to go-go-go without pausing to think.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Taurus April 20 to May 20
When you’re feeling the love, giving comes naturally. The planets want to reconnect you with your soft side, Taurus. Venus, your ruling planet, represents personal values, which is what makes you a values-driven person. One by one, Venus will be paying visits to the Zodiac’s ambassadors of kindness and freedom (Jupiter, Uranus, and Neptune) and the signs associated with sharing (Aquarius and Pisces). Each encounter will invite you to align your values and relationship more closely with what will heal those around you and improve your community.
Venus’ first few stops — with Jupiter on the 3rd and Uranus on the 6th — emphasise freedom and independence. These qualities will be important during these days. Your relationships may need some extra breathing room, too. It should be fun to loosen things up. You’ll have plenty of opportunities for new connections and the sort of pleasurable adventures associated with the phrase “spice up your love life."
On the 10th, Venus enters Pisces. At worst, this can make you idealise your loved ones, but happiness lies in keeping your relationships and leisure time simple, so you can appreciate what’s already there. When Venus passes by Neptune on the 21st, this energy intensifies. You’re more sensitive than usual to others’ pain, making it tough to maintain sensible boundaries. Use your sense of comfort as a guide and step back when you feel frazzled or rushed. This will give you space to ground yourself and, when you’re ready, step back in. Be patient with confusing interactions and be willing to let love leave its mark on your priorities. The last week of the month, you’ll have a chance to adjust your behaviour to better reflect what you care about most.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Gemini May 21 to June 20
Life stays interesting this month, Double Fine. Until the 18th, the sun is in Aquarius, a mental air sign like your own. Aquarius’ detached, social, and ever-changing energy fits you well, providing opportunities to use your talent for talk, networking, play, and casual investigations. The first week of February is a stable time that lets you expand your base of operations without having to give anything up. This could mean plenty of the stimulating variety you like or doing a Hermione-like time-stopping trick so you can attend your two favourite bands’ shows at once.
A pace that's way too busy will get awkward, if not impossible, as the month continues. On the 17th, when schedule-coordinating Mercury enters misty Pisces, you’re advised to slow down enough to hear yourself think. Even if you can keep the scrambled energy straight, your Tinder date, lunch buddy, and Meetup group will likely get confused. You’ll need to stay flexible and be open to the unexpected — luckily, that’s kind of the Gemini M.O.
If you have a fuzzy relationship to the truth or like to insist that everything’s subjective, Mercury’s encounter with Neptune on the 24th will make it near impossible to remember which line you told to whom. With the mega pileup on easily-injured Neptune, we’re all going to be more gullible and more sensitive to broken trust. Even if you don’t mean to mislead, others may take your words the wrong way and assume they count for more than they actually do. Communicate as best you can and listen to your inner voice. Other peoples’ feelings aren’t your responsibility, but they sure can cause trouble if you ignore them. Potentially productive arguments are brewing for month’s end. Have fun, but be sure you mean it.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Cancer June 21 to July 22
Imagine you’re floating in amniotic fluid, Cancer, but are signed up to run a marathon later the same afternoon. February has invited you to do something seemingly contradictory: to respond without reacting, to move forward without knowing where you’re going, and to resist self-comforting fantasies while opening your imagination. At first glance this may seem daunting, but it’s just a matter of following your gut.
The learning curve is steepest in early February. Around you, people will making missteps, going too fast, and running into invisible walls — or just gradually slowing to a standstill. You might find yourself stuck in the same muck. Be aware of where you’re reacting to others’ behaviour or getting frustrated. Around the 12th, the moon in Capricorn activates your sun, making you antsy to do and create. Your goals and needs are out of sync, though, and may mess up your timing. If you stop to look around, you’ll see it’s not just you. Your gut sense can guide you to act at the right moment, but your greatest success comes when you let yourself be moved by others’ pain, desire, and inspired vision.
A partial solar eclipse on the 15th lights up opportunities you didn’t know were there. The collective confusion peaks around this time, making it extra important to take care of yourself. Crankiness is good way to tell if you’re burning out or giving too much. Feeling abandoned, on the other hand, could be a clue that you need to get out of the house. Putting the focus on a stranger’s needs will help distract you from weakened self-confidence. A bold act of imagination could turn you into a superhero. Whatever happens, by the 25th, when the moon, your planetary ruler, comes home to Cancer, you’ll be feeling focused and clearer about how to get what you need.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Leo July 23 to August 22
How can you create more love, Leo? It’s the halfway point of your personal year and time for one last push. Projects you began and happy risks you took around your birthday are reaching a climax. Like a marathon runner about to reach the finish line, you must draw on your reserves and give it a final, high-powered burst. You aren’t going to be able to do this alone, though; if you try, you’ll end up creating enemies and pissing off the people who can help you succeed. Aquarius season is teamwork time, so throw a metaphorical flash mob with your ideal collaborators. Who will win when you do? Spread your spotlight to light up someone else’s talent. The attention they receive will shine on you, too, showing others how generous you can be. It’s a reflection of your true self, but try not to get a big head about it. Attempted generosity will be rejected if the recipient feels you’re being condescending. A good preventative measure is to make a practice of noticing what the people around you are good at, especially when those talents are different from your own. A good team is like a flock of geese: When one gets tired, another pulls to the front of the V, creating lift for everyone else. In other words, when your friends succeed, you do, too.
Getting over yourself is key in the second half of the month. With your ruler, the sun (and a bundle of other planets) in Pisces, you recharge by temporarily stepping off-stage. It’s awesome to know what you’re good at, but being good only matters if you’re doing it out of love. Reexamine any projects that tanked and ask yourself when and where you stopped having fun. The muse will find you if she knows you won’t blow her cover. Let yourself create for the sake of it. You can pick your audience later.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Virgo August 23 to September 22
Take in the big picture, Virgo. Your ruler, quick-thinking Mercury, entered cerebral Aquarius on January 31. For the last month, your nose was scraping against the grindstone, which likely helped you locate the root and try a fix for at least one major problem. Now, you’re straightening up to take in the lay of the land. You’re clear-headed and able to make connections under this influence. Tomorrow will come no matter how present you are today. Make sure your choices will stay relevant by including upcoming factors in your assessment. Friends in other fields have insightful feedback for your approach and your peers have the missing link you need. Put your heads together as a group to engineer cool, future-oriented solutions. Your day-to-day activities will be more interesting if they’re social, so send a group invite the next time you’re headed out to run.
The second half of the month is a bit of a challenge. With the sun, Venus, Mercury, and Neptune in your opposite sign, Pisces, tasks, goals, communication, and relationships will be unclear and sometimes confusing. It may seem chaotic, but that’s only because you’re most confident with clear categories and rules. You’ll need to rely on your weaker muscles of intuition and going with the flow. As with any new exercise class, you may not be doing as many reps as the other patrons of the Pisces gym. Be patient with yourself. Getting comfortable with the unknown is not so complicated. It just requires time and practice. When your anxieties build, look around at people who seem more at ease. What works for them may serve you, too. No matter what, you’ll be learning and that’s what counts.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Libra September 23 to October 22
The universe wants to be your BFF, Libra. With confident Jupiter high-fiving Venus, your ruling planet, February will begin with a promise that everything is going to work out as it should. Relationships will either feel amazing or just like an extra big deal. Make room for plenty of one-on-one time, especially with new friends and sweeties, or anyone who makes you feel part of their world. People you’re close to have a lot to teach you this month — or you may be ready to play the role of "encouraging big sibling" to a peer. It’s important to stay clear-headed, though. A first date may amount to not much and friends can promise you the moon without any real intention to follow through. Keep your wits about you and you can enjoy the meeting of minds without a rough letdown.
Queen Venus enters the astrological bubble bath that is Pisces on the 10th. Pisces is Venus’ favourite place, which means your strengths — kindness, fair values, receptivity, and responsiveness — are positively flowing and well-received by those around you. Everyone is affected by this transit as well as the movement of the sun and Mercury into Pisces on the 17th, so the world will be more your speed through the end of the month. Dip into your own metaphorical hot tub and open yourself to calls for help. You can partner with others in a subtle, influential way right now. Even your attitude makes a difference. Treat others as if they are capable of being better people and they may step up without noticing that they’re doing it. On the other hand, users will come out of the woodwork during this period. Rather than focusing on fairness, pay attention to your energy level. Someone who drains you likely has nothing to give in return (even if they mean well). Turning away from an energy vampire leaves you free to give to others who need your brains and graces just as much and will be far more appreciative.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Scorpio October 23 to November 21
Throw out your old tactics, Scorpio. This month, nudging and seducing people into place will backfire. Even if you have the follow-through, those around you will be too disoriented to play their parts right.
The first week of the month brings stimulating relationships and supports co-adventuring. You might feel you can get away with anything, and it’s true — but only temporarily. There’s no need for cat-and-mouse games, though. Say what you want plainly. Your collaborators and lovers will likely be receptive to any passionate scheme, so long as it’s inspiring.
As the 17th’s Neptune-Mars blind date approaches, you may notice that your energy is waning. Your typical focus will take more out of you. You can fight, but you’ll lose, so I don’t recommend it. Neptune’s whispering to you about the pleasurable release that comes with losing control. This is more about spirituality than sex, though you could try it both ways. To gain the most, give yourself over to (safe, sane) indulgence. What experience takes you out of your mind, in a good way? What trigger turns on your imagination? If your fears creep up to the surface, go swimming, soak in a tub — just visit a body of water. Insights will come when you align your physical experience to your feelings. Avoid the seduction of self-destructive escapes. Spending the month high or (purposefully) rehashing old traumas will leave you confused and weakened on the other end. You’ll surface around the 25th, ideally with a better sense of what you want and a hunger to act. Take a second to regain your bearings. The object of your desire will still be there in March.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Sagittarius November 22 to December 21
The truth is so close you can almost touch it, Archer. This month could bring you to the brink of understanding and pull it away at the last moment. Or it could help you see what’s been just out view the whole time.
February begins with sparkly chemistry between laid back Venus and adventurous Jupiter, your ruling planet. Your relationships have room for exploration and for both parties to have their own full lives. Take a whirlwind weekend road trip with someone you love or, if you’ve been locked away with your partner, infuse your love life with the romance of distance by hanging out with a new friend. This is a pretty nice period, but it will be easy to assume the other person is saying yes when they’re really on the fence. Your heart has beer goggles on, so have fun, but don’t throw away the receipt for your wedding dress.
On the 13th, Jupiter runs into mental Mercury, setting off an explosive brainstorm. Your mind is on fire, Sag — at least that’s how it feels. The friend on the other end of your messenger chat might disagree. Be kind to the patient people in your life, and don’t run your mouth if no one wants to listen. Your thoughts right now are first draft material — important, but not totally ready for public consumption. Write everything down, get it on video, or speechify to your pet. Later, you’ll have the perspective to cut back, fact check, and make it persuasive.
The second half of the month is quieter, because events are unfolding on a subtle, subconscious level. If you’re bored or antsy by the lack of action, seek out perspective. Libraries, woods, cliffs, starry skies, and city lights have secrets to whisper. Before you poo-poo the answers from the cosmos, let them soak in. The back of your mind needs some time to make the connections before it knows what’s real and what’s hot, fresh BS.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Capricorn December 22 to January 19
Good timing means knowing when to act and when to wait, Cappy. This month is one of those waiting periods. Which isn’t to say it’s a nonevent. In fact, what’s going down is crucial for your self-development.
During the first weeks of February, you’re solidly in provocative Aquarius territory. You have a solid, stable image, but you know change and breakdown are key for long-term stability. You often have to move across the country to get the job you want or cancel a going-nowhere romance to find a partner for life. With the sun, Venus, and Mercury in Aquarius, small changes early in the month speed your growth. The catch is, you don’t yet know where you’re going to land. That can be scary, but fear is just a feeling. Are you really going to let a mood hold you back?
As the month continues, it may feel like you’re traveling through fog — or that your voice is getting distorted through layers of water. The confusion is collective, but your brain’s resident gremlins may tell you it's your fault. Instead of tiring yourself out by pushing through invisible barriers, go back to the last landmark you recognise. Once you stop fighting for control, you’ll be able to see the trouble those around you are getting into. If they’re receptive, you can do a lot of good by guiding them to safety. Supporting others will show how far you’ve come since the last time you were lost and help you regain confidence. Around the 25th, the moon in Cancer, your opposite sign, offers energy and inspiration. You’re still a bit foggy, so ease into action, making sure to check in with anyone who has a stake in your goals. Reflect on what you’ve learned this month, especially any new understanding about your true desires. You’re working hard to reach your destination. Make sure it’s the one you want.
Illustrated by Abbie Winters.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
Fashion words are notoriously difficult to pronounce and unless you hear the names of certain luxury labels spoken, rather than just written down, it's easy to slip up in conversation. Hermès, Miu Miu, Balmain – there's so much potential for embarrassment.
So, we're glad to have been schooled by Donatella Versace, because it turns out that most of us have been pronouncing her last name incorrectly all along.
During an episode of Vogue's famous "73 Questions" series, which takes place in the designer's brother Gianni's glorious Italian home, she was asked which Italian word she wished English speakers would stop saying incorrectly.
Her answer? Versace. The correct way to say it is not "Versach-ee", as you may have thought, but "Versach-eh", and her pronunciation does, indeed, sound far more elegant. (Listen to the icon say it in the video below).
When asked which fashion trend she hopes will never return, unsurprisingly, she opted for "minimalism". She opted for heels over flats (naturally), leather over lace, gold over silver and New York over Milan. Her favourite thing about fashion? "That it's always evolving."
If she could have coffee with anyone in the world it would be Michelle Obama, while Barack would be her ultimate dinner date. (How long until someone makes that happen?)
The next Met Gala, which she believes will be "the best [one] ever" (because she's in charge) is what she's most excited about at the moment, and she had some wise words on what it means to be a woman in 2018. “It means to be aware of what’s happening in the world and [doing] something about it.”
A new travel index has ranked the 'hippest' up-and-coming neighbourhoods in the UK and Europe and some of the results may surprise you.
TravelSupermarket used three key metrics to compile the list, scoring neighbourhoods for the number of hip culture outposts (independent coffee shops, vintage fashion stores, vinyl record shops, vegan cafes and independent bike shops), creative capital density (the number of creative jobs in the area, art galleries etc) and traveller value (if the neighbourhood is good value for money for visitors).
As the aim was to find up-and-coming areas, penalty points were subtracted from areas that had peaked and high numbers of chain stores, such as Starbucks, Costa, Pret a Manger and Café Nero.
According to the Hip Hang-Out Neighbourhood Index,Montpelier in Bristol is the trendiest neighbourhood in the UK this year. The Bristol suburb came up trumps thanks to its coffee scene, Instagram-worthiness and vegan food and drink scene. It's described as having a multicultural, close-knit feel with plenty to offer vegans and art-lovers.
Many of London's most stereotypically hipster neighbourhoods also ranked highly, with Peckham, Stroud Green, Dalston and Clapton all among the top 10, along with Ancoats and Chorlton in Manchester.
The view from a Peckham rooftopPhoto: Anatoleya/Getty.
If you're looking for a trendy holiday on the continent, you'll want to consider Langstrasse in Zurich (Switzerland), which came out on top owing to its late-night bars, clubs and food spots; closely followed by the Norrebro and Vesterbro neighbourhoods of Copenhagen, which ranked in silver and bronze position. Don't know about you but this is making us yearn for a city break.
The UK's hippest neighbourhoods
1. Montpelier, Bristol 2. Peckham, London 3. Stroud Green, London 4. Dalston, London 5. Stokes Croft, Bristol 6. Clapton, London 7. Ancoats, Manchester 8. Old Town, Hull 9. Partick, Glasgow 10. Chorlton, Manchester 11. Baltic Triangle, Liverpool 12. Bishy Road, York 13. St Mawes, Cornwall 14. Romsey, Cambridge 15. Finnieston, Glasgow 16. Walthamstow, London 17. Ropewalks, Liverpool 18. Cliftonville/Old Town, Margate 19. Northern Quarter, Manchester 20. Jericho, Oxford
Europe's hippest neighbourhoods
1. Langstrasse, Zurich, Switzerland 2. Norrebro, Copenhagen, Denmark 3. Vesterbro, Copenhagen, Denmark 4. Bahnhofsviertel, Munich, Germany 5. Rosenthaler Platz, Berlin, Germany 6. Mariahilf, Vienna, Austria 7. Psiri, Athens, Greece 8. Het Eilandje, Antwerp, Belgium 9. Erzsebetvaros, Budapest, Hungary 10. Belleville, Paris, France 11. Pangrati, Athens, Greece 12. Haga, Gothenburg, Sweden 13. Kalamaja, Tallinn, Estonia 14. Savamala, Belgrade, Serbia 15. Miera Iela, Riga, Latvia 16. Kreuzberg, Berlin, Germany 17. Alamedia, Seville, Spain 18. Ranelagh, Dublin, Ireland 19. Portobello, Dublin, Ireland 20. Miguel Bombarda, Porto, Portugal
From poet Cleo Wade to The Good Quote, Instagram users have long proven that text-only posts has a place on the platform. A picture may be worth a thousand words, but sometimes, you just want some really cool fonts to get your point across. Now, Instagram is making that possible: With the launch of "Type" mode, Instagram Stories is tapping into its creative roots and offering users a whole new catalog of font options.
To use the new font options, open the Stories camera and swipe to "Type" mode (located to the left of "Live" mode). Tapping the button at the top of the screen will allow you to choose from a series of available fonts. Maybe "modern" expresses you best. Or perhaps you're into the old-school sass of "typewriter" style or the big and bold, protest sign-worthy lettering of "strong." On the other hand, the cursive of "neon" has a more delicate touch.
Whichever one you pick, you can then customise it further: Select all the text to change the colour, or tap the "A" icon to highlight the text. To add a photo to the background, tap the camera icon on the bottom right. To leave your text on a plain background, but change the colour of that background, tap the circle instead.
While many creatives have turned to external apps to add creative lettering their Instagram Stories, "Type" mode brings the functionality in-app, making for a more seamless process. Still, you can also use other apps, such as A Design Kit, for even more styles, as well as additional brush options. It's a wordsmith's (or aspiring wordsmith's) dream.
Today's update follows last week's introduction of GIF stickers. To add GIFs to your text-focused Story, simply tap the ">" button, select the sticker drawer, and choose "GIF." From there, you can choose a quirky animation to add even more flair.
Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?
Sometimes, the hype surrounding a book, film or other work of art is so frenzied that it deters you from engaging with it rather than drawing you in. A tsunami of rave reviews and glowing media coverage can make you feel a) that you've already read/watched/seen it yourself because you've read so much about it or b) certain it'll be a letdown.
Despite the brouhaha surrounding the novel Lullaby – known as Chanson Douce in France – it doesn't disappoint. The book, by 36-year-old French-Moroccan author and journalist Leila Slimani, is nothing short of a sensation, having sold 600,000 copies in France and winning the country's most prestigious literary prize, Le Prix Goncourt, last year. It tells the story of a charming middle-class Parisian couple, Myriam and Paul, their two young children and the nanny they trust, Louise. The book's first line is “The baby is dead," so it's no spoiler to say that things don't end well.
Slimani has become known in France for her fearless writing, having taken on other topics as taboo as infanticide: her first novel, 2014's Dans le Jardin de l’Ogre (In the Ogre’s Garden) explored female sex addiction, while her 2017 non-fiction book Sexe et Mensonges ( Sex and Lies) delved into the sex lives of Arab women. Translated versions of both books will be out in the UK next year.
Her cultural cachet is such that French president Emmanuel Macron invited her to be his minister of culture last year, a role she claims to have turned down because she values her freedom too much to sacrifice it for a political life. Instead, Slimani opted for an unpaid role as a representative of the French language abroad, a fitting appointment when you consider that Lullaby has been translated into 18 languages. Refinery29 met her to discuss modern motherhood, the politics of race and the backlash against #MeToo.
The book is often mentioned in the same breath as Gone Girl. How does that comparison make you feel?
I'm neither annoyed nor flattered, I’m very conscious that this is how my book is being marketed. I understand that some are reading my book as a thriller, but I don't think it's a thriller, because a thriller has its own codes and I felt very free to not stick to those codes.
One of your tactics is revealing the ending at the start, what was your thinking behind that?
Photo: Catherine Hélie/Editions Gallimard
It’s like a Greek tragedy. I like the idea of fate – it’s like telling the reader it’s going to end badly and you have the most important piece of information, but the parents don’t. So the reader will be looking at things with a lot of attention that the parents are ignoring and the reader wants to warn the parents, to tell them that something is wrong and that they need to be careful. I like the idea that the reader is going to be very attentive and is going to feel uncomfortable. It also helps to create tension – I wanted the book to have an atmosphere of anxiety and frustration, like a Polanski or Hitchcock movie.
The book's title is slightly different in the US – The Perfect Nanny – what was the thinking behind that?
My American editor told me that in American society, mothers are obsessed with the idea of perfection: being the perfect mother, the perfect nanny and there is anxiety around this idea of perfection, so we wanted to emphasise this. Maybe in European societies, [mothering is] more about lullabies and being caring. Maybe British and French women assume that they can’t be perfect, so it’s not a question of perfection.
I’m fighting for women's right to say that sometimes motherhood is annoying and it’s not always a pleasure to be mother.
How much of your own experience of being a mother is in the book?
I didn’t use my experience but I used my emotions. I tried to use all my fears and nightmares, to really confront them and not be afraid of my own fears. I wanted to look them in the eye, it's a sort of catharsis. In a way, I’m taking my anxiety and giving it to the reader.
Has writing the book changed your relationship with your children?
No. I’m always fighting women's right to be something other than a mother and to get out of the home. I’m fighting for women's right to say that sometimes motherhood is annoying and it’s not always a pleasure to be mother. But, paradoxically, sometimes I feel guilty for saying this and when I go back home, I think maybe I should take care of my children myself.
How do you feel about being asked about being a working mother who employs a nanny so often?
It’s funny when people ask me, "How do you do all this? How do you work and travel?" and I just say I’m doing it like every woman in the world, I’m doing my best. I’m trying. But you would never ask a man, "How do you do everything?" Or "Is it possible to have it all?"
There’s a strong rivalry between the nanny, Louise, and working mother Myriam in the book...
There is a very ambiguous feeling between a mother and a nanny. A mother wants her children to love the nanny but she doesn’t want them to love her too much because she is the mother and she wants to be the most loved. I wanted to show the contradiction between Myriam's mixed feelings.
A lot of people blame women for hiring nannies – even in some of the reviews of your book.
But they don’t blame men.
Do you think that will ever change?
Yes, first we must give more value to the work of a nanny. The more we value their work, the more we will be conscious of the fact that we need them to have the lives we have, that it wouldn't be possible for women to be empowered, to work and have individual lives, without these women taking care of our children. And the more that fathers are involved in family life, the less we will judge women for hiring nannies.
On the subject of social class, have readers reacted to Lullaby differently depending on whether they're middle class, as Myriam and Paul are, or working class, like Louise?
Yes. I'd say that Myriam and Paul are hipsters – I also define myself as hipster – they’re a cool couple and my hipster friends said to me, "Wow you’re a little bit harsh on our cultural class," but I wanted to show the contradictions in this class, because they are open-minded, nice and cool, but there are a lot of contradictions. I've received a lot of mail from nannies and have been moved and touched by what they've told me – that, even though the end of the book is terrible, I paid tribute to their work and the fact that their work is very difficult, and that no one is seeing them. They’re invisible.
There are film versions of the book underway in both France and the US – are you involved in either project inany way?
I’m not involved at all. As an author, I don’t think you own your book. I’ve written it and it’s not mine anymore.
I don’t think all men are pigs and I don’t think you are born a pig, I think that you become a pig.
You've written passionately about #MeToo and France's version, #BalanceTonPorc (call out your pig), denouncing the 100 French women who rebuked the movements in a recent article for [French newspaper] Libération. How would you sum up your reaction to the backlash?
I don’t think all men are pigs and I don’t think you are born a pig, I think that you become a pig and it's important to say that men are free to define themselves in ways other than as predators or harassers. Freedom is very important. I think those women [who signed the letter] are fighting for the right for men to bother women, but I think the most important fight is for women's right to not be bothered. The fight of women in a lot of countries where being in public spaces is quite impossible for women.
There’s a stereotype of French women being less feminist and more OK with being passive compared with other women. Is that true?
I don't think it's true. French feminists do fight for certain rights, like equal salaries and the right to not be bothered in public spaces, but it is true that they assume a sort of contradiction – that being a feminist doesn't mean we always want to active in front of men. Sometimes we want to be a sexual object. It’s a little bit taboo, but I think sometimes French women hold this contradiction.
If we face the reality that winter will be here for longer than we're willing to admit, that might make the fact that spring is still a ways away a bit more bearable. Now that we've got that out of the way, we can make the best of what we've got — and that means reviving that vintage coat you thought you were done with, learning how to layer the summer pieces you thought you'd have to wait three more months to wear, or injecting some much-needed colour into your neutrals-only repertoire (we get it, we do it too).
For us, dressing in February is even more special — it's Fashion Month, and all the shows and street style slideshows continue to encourage us to experiment; to give trends we once saw as unapproachable a try, and to push ourselves beyond our comfort zones. A bright pink set? Pom-pom earrings? Matrix -style sunglasses? It's all here, and it's all yours for the taking.
Introducing the three primary levels of colourblocking: base layer, outerwear, shoes.
